Hostage

Hostage

So desperate to wander out my door,
I peek through window shades to watch the sun:
A warm friend I can't visit anymore,
And not the only playmate I must shun.
For other friends can carry tiny threats,
Wee microscopic menaces, unreal,
Until my wimpy immune system lets
Them teach me just how bad someone can feel.
Instead of reaching out to those I know,
I hide within the confines of my home,
Dreaming of days of freedom, long ago,
And silently I wish that I could roam.
I'm hostage to a hidden enemy,
And fear the most the things I cannot see.

Mick McKellar
March 2013

Joseph Heller wrote in Catch-22, “Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you.” For me, paranoia used to be a hobby, now it has become a way of life. I swear, one of these days, I will wash the skin right off my hands. There are days I want to throw caution to the wind and just mix and mingle, but common sense prevails before panic sets in. It is then I remember what William S. Burroughs wrote in his adventure novella Ghost of Chance: “Panic is the sudden realization that everything around you is alive.” Captain Mission was talking about the jungle of Madagascar, but for me it's just home...

Mick